


Fear Can't Hurt You Anymore Than A Dream

by radiosatan



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: First Kiss, Haunted House, M/M, Mentions of past abuse, Panic Attack, Post-Canon, hand holding, listen kevin day has a rough go of it and he's trying his best to be better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:55:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26452963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/radiosatan/pseuds/radiosatan
Summary: Kevin Day wants fear to stop running his life. Things are usually easier said than done, though, aren't they?The OG foxes go to a haunted house!
Relationships: Kevin Day/Aaron Minyard
Kudos: 49





	Fear Can't Hurt You Anymore Than A Dream

**Author's Note:**

> y'all it has been literal YEARS since I've written anything. 
> 
> This was supposed to be fun, lighthearted, super short! It turned real stressful and real long, so my bad

“Neil, I can’t believe you’ve never been to a haunted house before!” Nicky was screaming one Sunday morning from the couch in the Columbia house living room. Curled up in the chair, Andrew on the floor at his feet, Neil just laughed.

“Oh, I’m sure you can believe it, actually,” Neil started. “My life was scary enough, why would I want to manufacture my own terror?”

Andrew laughed softly from the floor. Nicky looked only a little uncomfortable with Neil’s response. “Well your life’s not a shitshow anymore, so we’re taking you to a haunted house. They’re so fun and honestly not that scary, right guys?” He looked around the room, turning in his seat to look at Aaron on the other end of the couch and Kevin sprawled on the floor, hoping to elicit a response from someone. Aaron wasn’t paying attention, scrolling through something on his phone, so Kevin answered, shrugging his shoulders noncommittally.

Kevin had also never been to a haunted house, but wasn’t really in the mood to hear Nicky gripe about it, so he kept his mouth shut and went back to staring at the ceiling from his spot on the floor.

He was in kind of in the same boat as Neil in this respect. Growing up, his life was already so terrifying that it was liked he lived in a haunted house year-round. His friends never seemed to realize this, though. They were always shocked to learn that Neil hadn’t had the “normal” life experiences everyone else did and tried to combat it with giving him as many of those experiences as possible. They never stopped to question or even think about the fact that Kevin hadn’t had any of those experiences either. Just because he had a place to call home growing up, doesn’t mean it was anything normal, doesn’t mean he was able to do anything that other kids did.

“Day!” he heard yelled with a clap in his general direction. Startled out of his thoughts, he sat up, eyes glancing around the room.

“What?” he asked.

“Did you hear any of what I just said?” Nicky’s voice was exasperated, if not a little hurt.

“Honestly, no.”

Nicky sighed heavily. “I swear no one listens to me,” he grumbled mostly to himself. Then to Kevin, “What are you doing Thursday and-slash-or Saturday?”

“Practicing, sleeping, drinking, I don’t know.”

“Great answer,” Nicky smiled. “We’re going to a haunted house!”

Kevin rolled his eyes. “Saturday then. We have a game on Friday, and we need Thursday to practice.”

He caught sight of Andrew rolling his eyes at this, obviously tired of Kevin’s one-track mind.

Nicky didn’t seem to care. “Cool, I’m going to look up some places!” he said, flitting out of the room.

They left Columbia that afternoon without any more talk about haunted houses. Kevin was glad for it, if he was being honest. He’d kind of hoped Nicky would forget, or not be able to find a place before the weekend, or something. Kevin hated being scared. He’d been scared his whole life and was tired of it. He just wanted to focus, get better at being a functioning person, and exist. He didn’t want to be screamed at by clowns and weirdly tall men with chainsaws.

He brought one knee up to sit more comfortably in the middle seat. He wrapped his arms around it, placed his forehead on his kneecap, and fell asleep.

It was Aaron who woke him up when they got back to Fox Tower, with a hit to the temple and an “Oy, shithead.” Kevin groggily lifted his head, looking around the car. It was empty, doors shut like it had been for a while, save for him and Aaron. He turned to look at Aaron, bleary eyes narrowed.

“Where is everyone?” He asked.

“Already went inside,” Aaron answered, hand on the door, ready to leave.

“Then why are you still here? Why did they all leave me?” Kevin had meant to just sound confused, which he was, but had realized after he’d said it, that it came out as hurt, which he might have been, too.

Aaron had opened the door but didn’t move to get out. He had a strange look on his face, but with a shake of the head, his normal look returned, and he answered. “No one else was willing to wake you up. Apparently, you can be a real asshole.” He smirked before continuing. “And I have to go talk to Katelyn, which I don’t want to do. So I’m stalling.” He didn’t look at Kevin anymore, but leaned back against the seat and stared up into the car.

Kevin couldn’t help but notice Aaron’s abrupt change in demeanor. His last words had come out casual and smooth, but Aaron’s tight face and rigid body said something very different.

“Why don’t you want to talk to her?” Kevin tried. Him and Aaron weren’t normally close in the way that they would talk about things like this. Or talk about anything at all. Something in Aaron’s face though, had compelled Kevin to ask. It was clear he was hurting and, as someone who’d been hurting non-stop for twenty something years, Kevin felt some sort of moral obligation to help.

Aaron sighed heavily but turned his head toward Kevin. He was still leaned against the headrest. “I’m afraid she’s gonna break up with me, man.” Another casual sentence wrought with hurt in Aaron’s voice.

Kevin smiled sadly and asked, “Why would she do that? After everything you guys went through just to be together. Doesn’t she love you?”

Aaron winced at Kevin’s words and explained, a little bite in his voice. “I don’t fucking know. I thought she loved me. Maybe she did, past tense?” He paused, gathering his thoughts. “I haven’t seen her outside of class in weeks and she’s like…really short with me over text. She has this new friend from class she’s been hanging out with and this girl like, straight up hates me. Every time I see her, she gives me the worst glare and whispers shit to Katelyn. I don’t even know if I did anything because she won’t talk to me long enough to tell me. I tried texting her all last night and she never responded but sent me this this morning.” Aaron stopped to pull up the message on his phone

_Hey, we should talk. (:_ It read.

“Yikes,” was all Kevin could say.

“Do you think that’s bad? Do you think that girl convinced her to dump me? I’m freaking the fuck out man. I’ve like, obviously never been dumped before and I’m afraid it’s going to fucking hurt.”

Kevin didn’t know what to say. It was the most vulnerable he’d ever seen Aaron and quickly realized that under his tough and apathetic façade, Aaron _was_ scared. Not just of Katelyn breaking up with him, but of everything. Kevin could work with that. He understood fear, understood what it did to you if you let it consume your life, understood how good it felt to leave it behind.

“Hey,” he started softly. “I can’t tell you it’s not going to hurt because it is. But I can tell you that being afraid of it and avoiding it isn’t going to help anyone. Listen, you go talk to her. Maybe she breaks up with you, maybe she doesn’t. We’ll be here for you no matter what. You have to give yourself the ability to feel, to get hurt. You can’t let your fear rule your life. Or you’ll end up like me.” The last part was meant to be a joke, but Kevin’s voice was so soft, it might have sounded genuine.

Aaron smiled anyway. It wasn’t a big smile, but it was enough of a change that Kevin noticed right away in their close proximity.

“That was really fucking profound,” Aaron answered, almost back to his normal voice, with only a hint of question in it. “Thanks, man. Honestly. You’re like, weirdly helpful.” He moved abruptly to get out of the car.

Kevin, still sitting in the backseat cocked his head and said, “thanks, I think that’s a compliment.”

“It is,” was all Aaron said, as he turned around to leave. Kevin watched him weave through cars in the parking lot, disappearing in pursuit of the cheerleaders’ dorms.

Kevin finally got out, grabbed his bag from the trunk, and headed up to his own dorm. He ignored glances from Neil and Andrew on the couch and flopped onto his bed to go back to sleep.

Kevin woke up again around 4am. He pulled his phone from its charging place on the floor, not entirely sure what he was looking for. He had several emails from the evening before, a handful of texts from the team’s group chat, and calendar reminder for a paper due. He shrugged down at the lock screen before getting up to start coffee. He found no point in going back to bed, when they had to be at the gym in two hours anyway.

In the kitchen, Kevin put together everything necessary to make coffee and lifted himself onto the counter to wait for it.

He considered texting Aaron to see how his talk with Katelyn went, but thought better of it, realizing that he was probably still asleep and would see Kevin in less than two hours anyway if he was really inclined to talk about it.

Kevin instead, found himself thinking about their car conversation from the day before. He had to admit that it was really strange. Kevin and Aaron had never talked about anything but exy or video games before and Aaron’s impending breakup seemed like a weird new topic to start on. It was…almost nice, though, being able to talk to someone about their feelings without having to worry about judgement or repercussions. He never would have spoken to anyone like that in the Nest, never would have given anyone the indication that he had any emotions at all. He was enjoying being this new Kevin. A free Kevin, a semi-happy Kevin, a Kevin who had normal college experiences like going to a haunted house with his friends.

Kevin sighed heavily at the remembrance of their upcoming weekend plans. Even newly free, semi-happy, advice giving Kevin found himself just a little terrified at the idea of being frightened in public, in front of his friends.

The coffee pot beeped, indicating it was ready. Kevin hopped off the counter, pouring himself a cup, and headed back into the bedroom to try and get ready for the day.

Nobody spoke for the entirety of morning practice. Normally, the silence that meant his team was actually trying would please Kevin, but he was anxious to know what happened with Aaron, if for no other reason than to see if his advice was sound, if other people could really, truly remove fear from their heart and just _live_.

Aaron didn’t speak to him, though. Aaron didn’t do as much as acknowledge Kevin was in the room. That wasn’t necessarily out of character, though, as Aaron rarely acknowledged his teammates in most situations.

8:30 finally rolled around and Wymack yelled to his team to “pack it up, folks!” Everybody immediately complied and made their way to the showers. Silence followed them there, as well. Kevin felt uneased by the lack of conversation from anyone and left quickly after showering.

He’d had three classes on Monday, all of which were nearly unmemorable. He arrived to the court early for afternoon practice and decided to go over stats of this week’s competitors.

Slowly, other foxes trickled in, all opting to sit with Kevin in the lounge. Finally, Aaron arrived with Neil, Nicky, and Andrew. Andrew gave Kevin a dirty look for not riding to the stadium with them, but otherwise ignored him. Nicky spoke animatedly about something he’d learned in class that Neil looked genuinely interested in. Aaron clearly wasn’t listening but sat next to Nicky on the last couch anyway, feeling somehow involved in the story. Kevin tried to catch Aaron’s eye, but it was as if he was avoiding his gaze on purpose. Kevin rolled his eyes and returned to what he was doing.

Not long after, Wymack emerged from his office and shooed the foxes into the locker rooms to change for practice. Like that morning, it was uneventful and nearly silent. The only conversation was whatever felt necessary in relation to the game. It was normally something that Kevin yearned for, a team committed to practice, not distracted by their own personal conversations, but found that after nearly two years with the foxes, it was an unsettling change of pace he wasn’t sure he wanted anymore.

He left quickly after practice again, ignoring stares from Andrew, Nicky, and Neil about not riding back to the dorms with them.

The next few days were rather uneventful, as well. Nicky announced to the upperclassmen on Tuesday afternoon that they were invited (and morally obligated to come) to a haunted house that Saturday. Idle, excited chatter continued through the end of practice.

Wednesday afternoon found Kevin at the court early again. He’d come straight from class, not having a reason to go back to the dorms, so he worked on some reading he had for one of his classes.

Engrossed in his book, Kevin didn’t notice the door open and only realized someone was in the room with him when he felt a weight shift on the couch. He looked up to see Aaron sitting next to him on the couch, staring intently at Kevin.

“Dude, are you okay?” Was all Kevin could ask.

Aaron dropped his shoulders and stopped staring as intently, but still faced Kevin on the couch. “Your advice was kind of shit,” Aaron said pointedly. Kevin must have looked confused because Aaron continued. “You told me to stop being afraid and just let myself get hurt, and that—that’s kind of shitty advice.” Aaron didn’t necessarily sound angry at Kevin, but he was clearly hurt by something. Kevin guessed it was Katelyn.

“What did she say?”

“Exactly what I fucking guessed! Her friend convinced her that I didn’t treat her right and that I was, like, not focused enough on her or whatever. She fucking dumped me.”

Kevin had more or less known that that was what Aaron was going to say, but still felt a pang of hurt for Aaron after he did.

“I’m sorry man,” Kevin tried. He knew it wouldn’t help much, but he couldn’t for the life of him figure out what else to say.

“Whatever. I just wanted you to know that your advice was shitty.” Aaron’s masked hurt was so apparent now. He was angry at Kevin because he couldn’t be angry at himself, didn’t want to be angry at Katelyn. He wanted help getting through it, but Kevin knew there was no way Aaron would ever ask. Kevin tried to help the only way he knew how: exy

“It wasn’t, though. The advice I mean. Shitty. I told you that it was going to hurt. But I told you that getting hurt was infinitely better than living your life afraid of what everyone around you is going to do. Ignoring Katelyn’s break-up wasn’t going to do anything but delay the inevitable and just cause more hurt later. So yeah, it fucking sucks and I get it, but there’s nothing we can do now but heal and move on. Be angry, fine. Be angry at Katelyn, at yourself, the world, me. I don’t care. But use your anger for something good. Kick ass on the court this week. Kick _my_ ass on the court today. Whatever. You might think it’s stupid, but as someone who was afraid of literally everything my entire life, who was angry at everyone for making me afraid, playing exy was one of the best things I could do with that anger. It was the only place that I could be angry without repercussions. More or less.” Kevin’s voice faded to nearly a whisper by the end.

Aaron just stared at Kevin. It wasn’t the bored, apathetic stare that Andrew had, or even a normal stare of _you’re a fucking idiot_ that would be in character for Aaron to have. It was something Kevin hadn’t recognized. It was almost kind. Almost endearing? It confused Kevin deeply, to the point that he asked, almost defensively, “What?”

Aaron’s face changed immediately. It returned to its normal apathy and turned away from Kevin. “Ugh, nothing,” was all Aaron said, and the boys returned to silence.

Kevin picked up his book again, trying to focus on the words. He just kept trying to unravel the mystery of Aaron’s face, making little progress by the time the rest of the team arrived and practice began.

They lost their game that Friday. Normally, Kevin would be angry, disappointed, something. Now, though, he was able to focus less on what the point total actually was and more on how his teammates played. They tried their best against a team that was _really_ good and came away only 2 points shy of victory. His main focus, though, was Aaron. Aaron wasn’t by any standards a great player. He tried his best, but didn’t normally have what it took to be truly great.

Now though, Kevin saw a difference in the way Aaron played, in how _well_ he played. He still wasn’t great, but he was better. He was angry and it worked for him.

As the foxes shuffled off the court and back to the locker rooms, Aaron shot Kevin a look that Kevin couldn’t read. He smiled anyway and kept walking. As he passed Aaron just before the doors out of the outer court, he whispered, “good game, stay angry.” He didn’t glance back to see if Aaron heard him but felt Aaron’s stare in the back to his head that suggested he did.

After showering and getting changed, the foxes partied in the dorm basement despite their loss. Everyone was happy with their performance and was even more thrilled that _Kevin_ was happy with their performance.

The night was going well, team bonding and heavy drinking underway, when someone made the mistake of asking Aaron why Katelyn or the other Vixens hadn’t come and joined the party. Kevin immediately turned his head to look at Aaron, to gauge how volatile his reaction was going to be.

“Oh, she dumped me,” he responded casually, arms crossed from where he lay on one of the couches.

Jack laughed and went to say something, but at least four people, Kevin and Neil included, shot him a glare so heavy, he said very little the rest of the evening.

Allison stepped in, instead. “What happened?” Her voice suggested legitimate concern, but knowing her, Kevin could have guessed it was her being incredibly nosy or seeing if she could have won a bet.

Aaron made eye contact with Kevin while he answered. “She said I was a bad boyfriend and that I cared too much about ‘other things’ that didn’t include her.” Chatter quickly broke out around the room. Choruses of “I’m sorry” and “fuck her, you deserve better” filled the room. Kevin sat still, eyes still on Aaron, a weird feeling in his gut. He’d already known what Katelyn had said, Aaron had told him the other day. Still, the way he described it now seemed immensely different, but Kevin couldn’t point out why.

Aaron dropped his gaze and stood from the couch he was on, announcing he was going to bed. Kevin stewed the rest of the night on all the weird things Aaron had done that week: from a casual compliment to prolonged eye contact and gazes Kevin didn’t understand.

He awoke on Saturday just before noon. Stumbling out of the bedroom, still bleary eyed, Kevin poured himself a cup of coffee. Turning to face the living room, he was shocked to see that Aaron was sitting on a beanbag playing video games with Nicky. Neil and Andrew sat on the couch together, looking at something on one of their phones. Although Aaron was watching the game screen and successfully playing whatever it was, Kevin still felt Aaron’s stare. He was suddenly acutely aware that he was only wearing a T-shirt and boxers. _Why does it matter?_ He thought. _This is normal. This is how you always sleep. Aaron knows that, he used to live with you._ Kevin furrowed his eyebrows and hoisted himself up on the counter to drink his coffee.

Kevin vaguely heard the sounds of the game ending, but still jumped when Nicky suddenly stood before him in the kitchen. “ _Jesus,_ ” he breathed.

Nicky didn’t notice Kevin’s fright and started speaking anyway. “We’re all getting dinner before we go and so we’re leaving here at 5:30. If you’re not ready then, you’re not coming.” Kevin knew that Nicky was joking because no matter how much Kevin wanted to, he wouldn’t be able to get out of this excursion.

Packed into the Maserati that evening, Neil and Nicky bubbled with excitement. Neil was asking all kinds of questions about the attraction, the monsters, everything. Andrew and Aaron sat silent in apathy, and Kevin silently stewed with dread.

They arrived to a restaurant that Kevin had never heard of just before the upperclassmen. The five of them went in to get a table, Matt’s truck arriving just as they were being brought back. The nine foxes sat and talked and ate. Kevin was again silent for most of it and nobody pressed him as to why.

Getting back in the car, Kevin slid to the middle of the back seat, Aaron sliding to sit close on his left side. No one else was in the car, yet.

“What the fuck is your problem?” Aaron asked, voice low. He suddenly wished that Aaron spoke French or they both spoke a different language so Kevin wouldn’t feel so exposed. He shrugged and settled for, “I don’t want to be here. I don’t like being scared.”

Aaron’s face softened. “Then don’t be. You’ve been telling me all week to stop letting fear control me, now you’ve got to do the same.”

Kevin stared at Aaron and sighed. He didn’t have the time, energy, or ability to explain to Aaron the difference between what he’d been preaching to Aaron all week and his own fear. It was vastly different to be afraid of the people around you, afraid of what they would do, afraid of simply _being alive_ than it was to be afraid of monsters, ghosts, or Halloween haunted houses. “It’s different,” was all he could say before the other three got in the car and they all headed to the attraction.

It wasn’t a long drive there. Neil and Nicky were so excited they were looking out the window, hands and noses pressed to the glass like little kids. As Andrew turned into the parking lot and Kevin caught and glance of the haunted house, he was filled instantly with dread. Before them, standing tall and ominous was a looming black castle. Kevin gasped, throat suddenly tight. Just the sight of the building sent Kevin to a dark place of his mind, one that remembered the abuse, the torture, the never-ending darkness. He couldn’t breathe right, he wanted to cry. And what was worse was that his friends didn’t seem to notice. They just kept inching their way through traffic, until they were finally directed where to park.

Kevin scrambled out of the car with everyone else, needing the chilled night air and the dirt at his feet to ground him. He was fine. He wasn’t at Evermore, he wasn’t in West Virginia. He was somewhere outside of Columbia, South Carolina with his _friends_. He took a deep breath and faced the group, as ready as he was ever going to be.

The nine of them walked to the to the booth to purchase their tickets before finding their way to line. It was packed, being the last night open, so they were in for a wait that could last up to 2 hours. Kevin’s entire body was filled with dread. The closer they got to the tower, the more claustrophobic Kevin became. The sun was down completely down now, tall flood lights giving ominous shadows to everything.

Just under an hour and a half later, the group finally reached the door. The actor waiting to let people in was dressed as the Crypt Keeper. He took their tickets and opened the door for them to enter. Kevin was immediately hit with fear like a ton of bricks. Inside the castle was, unsurprisingly, darker than the line outside. The only sources of light were portrait lights illuminating eerie photos and red bulbs casting the entire room into something evil.

“I’m so fucking excited,” Neil whispered.

“I know right,” Nicky responded.

A flurry of general thrill emitted from the rest of the group, all moving together through the rooms.

It could not have been more apparent before this moment just how much Kevin Day did not want to be here. The second room the entered was no longer red, had instead strange white and blue lights illuminating the room into a laboratory. A mad scientist laughed maniacally and cut into a bloody woman screaming.

The dread subsided as they moved farther through the haunt, only to be replaced by healthy _fear_. Things jumped out at them and Kevin screamed. Allison screamed. Nicky screamed. Andrew laughed.

Kevin looked at their group walking through a short maze before getting to the section of clowns. Everyone comforted one another. Allison screamed and Renee took her hand. Matt cursed and almost hit a mannequin, Dan wrapped herself into him. Even Andrew held Neil’s hand and Nicky hooked his elbow into Neil’s other arm. Aaron and Kevin stood beside one another, but no one seemed concerned that either of them were scared.

As they approached the end of the maze and the walls turned brighter colors, turning into a fun house, Aaron whispered, “God, I hate clowns.”

“I hate this entire fucking place,” Kevin responded.

Aaron looked at him then, almost smiling. As they turned a corner, a clown jumped out in front of them, holding something vaguely weapon shaped. Everyone screamed and Aaron squeezed his hand into Kevin’s. Kevin, terrified out of his mind, too, didn’t pull away, didn’t say anything. Aaron didn’t let go either.

Once the clowns were finished, Kevin figured things would lighten up. He didn’t know much about haunted houses, but weren’t clowns the scariest part? Apparently not in this haunted house they weren’t. A few rooms in after the clown section, Kevin began to let his guard down again. He didn’t think Aaron was scared anymore and was expecting to lose his hand. They entered a silent room, pitch black, and Kevin was glad he didn’t. A door slammed behind them and more red lights illuminated the room before them. A railing separated them from the scene but it didn’t help Kevin’s traumatized mind make it seem any less real. A man, screaming obscenities, viciously tortured a young woman, who screamed for it to stop.

Kevin squeezed Aaron’s hand and pulled their bodies closer together. Kevin needed to be reminded that what he was seeing was not real, was not a memory of the violent torture he’d witnessed throughout his life. 

Aaron didn’t seem at all bothered by Kevin’s closeness. “Don’t be afraid,” he whispered into Kevin’s chest. “Don’t let it control you.”

He kept Kevin’s hand clasped in his own and let Kevin’s body lean against his until walking to the next room made it logistically difficult.

The two held hands the rest of the way through the attraction, only squeezing the other in fear a few times each.

As the exit came closer and Kevin was able to once again see the floodlights that promised the outside world still existed, he could breathe. He’d finally made it through this nightmare and was eager to never have to experience this again.

The group stepped up onto the grass on the other side of the castle, all looking around, blinking their way back into vision. Nicky separated himself from Neil and Andrew, Renee looked away from Allison, blushing, and let go of her hand, even Matt and Dan separated enough to just hold hands normally. Kevin felt Aaron tug his hand away and, while he expected him to, needed him to, he felt himself disappointed at the lack of touch between the two now.

Nobody said anything, all still reeling from the haunt, so they walked silently together back to their cars. They said their goodbyes/see you in a bits and all piled back into their respective cars. Kevin didn’t take the middle this time, relegating that to the much shorter Aaron, who just fit better anyway. He leaned his head against the window and closed his eyes. He knew that he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep, but he just needed a minute after the misery of that haunted house.

He didn’t get much more than a literal minute before Nicky piped up excitedly from the other side of the back seat. “So, Neil how was your first haunted house? How did everyone like this one?”

Neil responded honestly, though with not as much enthusiasm as Nicky. “That was pretty fucking terrifying, I liked it a lot.”

Kevin answered, as well, even if Nicky’s ‘everyone’ was rhetorical. “That was the worst thing I’ve ever experienced, I’m never coming to one of these fucking things again.”

Nicky scoffed, but it quickly turned into a laugh. It almost made Kevin angry that Nicky thought he was kidding. That his friends really didn’t understand that Kevin had not felt true terror, true dread like that in his waking life for nearly two years. He almost opened his mouth to say something, but felt Aaron’s hand against his own arm. Kevin lifted his head off the window to look at the touch. Aaron’s arms were crossed against his chest, right arm secretly touching Kevin’s bicep. He shifted his gaze to Aaron’s face, where he caught Aaron smile softly at him and shake his head. Kevin nodded, smiling softly himself, before leaning back against the window. Aaron’s hand remained where it was.

They returned to the dorms just before midnight. Neil and Andrew ran up to the roof without a glance for anyone, the girls headed into their room with Matt in tow, and Nicky called first shower as he disappeared into the bathroom. Kevin, not wanting to be alone after their adventure, Kevin let Aaron come with him into his room. They sat on the couch together the way they had in the stadium lounge earlier in the week. Both kind of sideways and looking at one another. Neither spoke for a while.

It was finally Aaron who spoke first. “Are you okay, now?”

Kevin blinked at Aaron, obviously confused. Before he could actually answer, Aaron continued to explain.

“I know what that place looked like. I know why you were so scared, I get it. I don’t know why Nicky chose that place. He’s an idiot, I’m sorry.”

Kevin smiled sadly. “Yeah, thanks. I don’t think I’m okay right now. I meant what I said in the car. It might have been a little exaggerated, but I hated that so much and I never want to go to one again. It brought up a lot of shit that I’ve been able to keep out of my head for a while now. But I think I’ll be okay. I know I will. I have to be. I don’t want to be afraid forever. I refuse to be.”

Kevin, who had been looking at his hands for most of his response, looked back up to Aaron. He was staring at Kevin the same way he had been after Kevin’s long-winded speech on Wednesday. Kevin still didn’t understand it, didn’t know what Aaron wanted. He just smiled gently and shrugged.

Aaron smiled, too, before leaning forward and pressing their lips together. It was small and hesitant, but Kevin couldn’t say he hated it. Aaron pulled away, soft smile still on lips and said, “We’ll be here to help. Or well, I don’t know about the rest of these fuckers, but I’ll be here. You should be okay again, you should be happy. Maybe we can be okay again and happy together.”

Kevin nodded, laughed, and kissed Aaron again. 

**Author's Note:**

> fun fact: the girl being tortured violently was me at the last haunted house i worked at. i almost broke my elbow being thrown to the ground so much. it was sick.


End file.
